Things I’ve Learned in my First Month of Living Alone
Things I’ve Learned in my First Month of Living Alone
I just moved to Honolulu, Hawaii from Atlanta, Georgia. I’m 21, and I lived with my parents. I’m now living in a studio “apartment” which is really a remodeled 2 car garage. Its small, but I’ve made the space my own, and I love it. The family that owns the house live above me, and they are so sweet. I live 2 miles from my younger sister, who is going to the University of Hawaii (#gobows). I’m a soloprenurer, which means I work alone and for myself. I was walking back home after a coffee shop work sesh, and I started thinking about the insane differences between my life 2 months ago and now. And I figured the world should know about it. So heres what I’ve learned in the last, well now almost 6 weeks.
Leaving the house is a must.
I live + work alone in a new city. That means I don’t see people unless I am very intentional about seeing people. I’m a self diagnosed introvert. I love living alone, I love my alone time. So if I’m not careful, I don’t leave the house for 3 days straight. Seriously. Its dangerous, and not healthy. So I made a rule that took while to establish and follow. I make myself leave the house at least once every singe day. Every. Single. Day. No exceptions. If I don’t have the rule, I don’t leave the house.
Its really freaking lonely.
Living alone is great- I choose how everything is decorated, no body gets on to me about not doing the dishes or doing them (and all the cleaning) at 2 am. I wouldn’t trade this season for anything. I’m not saying id never have a roommate, but I love being alone right now. But sometimes it’s incredibly lonely. I spent 4 weeks knowing not one soul on this island except my sister, who, as a college freshman, is often very busy with other college freshman. I finally made some acquaintances, but I don’t have any real friends yet, and knowing there isn’t a single person to go grab dinner or a coffee with in a 4500 mile radius is real depressing sometimes.
I have to be extremely internal about meeting people.
Piggy backing on my previous point, I don’t make friends unless I go out intentionally seeking them. I don’t have coworkers, I don’t have classmates. I gotta hunt them down. And its hard and awkward and not conventional in this society. If you have tips please feel free to send them my way. Or if you’re in Hawaii and also need friends, HMU.
You get to know yourself real well, real quick.
Your habits, good and bad, your true character. You find it out real quick. There’s no one to blame for bringing Oreos into the house. There is no one else’s schedule that gets in the way of going to the gym, or getting what needs to be done, done. No ones habits are effecting you anymore. You are you are you.
Hawaii is so. freakin. beautiful.
It’s incredible, and I feel lucky every day.
It helps the loneliness, the anxiety, the fear. I don’t know why, but its calming as hell.
Calling your momma is the single greatest thing in the world.
and for a while, you’ll cry every time you hang up. Or think about her. Or see someone who looks like her. Yeah I’ve cried on the bus, in stores, and in my bathroom doorway cause I missed her so damn much. Dad too. They are the single greatest humans on the planet, and I’d be lost without them. Hell, I’m crying right now. I honestly have no idea how I’m surviving with out them, i know it has something to do with something they did though.
You have to go out at least once a week.
Buy yourself a coffee or a beer at LEAST once a week, if not like 3 or 4.
Pasta is my queen.
Netflix is the best and worst thing in the world.
Yeah the background noise is comforting, but its such a distraction, and not what you need
Church is non negotiable.
Its the place that feels most like home. Its welcoming, the songs are the same, and God is the same. And its the place I’ve met the most people, and the greatest people.
Target is still comforting no matter what state you’re in.
Thats all I need to say about it really
Surfing is super hard.
You gotta have fun.
Whether its surfing, reading, dancing, a hobby, you’ve gotta get out there and have fun as much as possible
Your best friends are still your best friends.
They’re still the ones I turn to, they’re still my support system.
Amazon Shows (or Skype or FaceTime) are your friends.
Getting mail is the best.
Packages from home, letters, and even bank statements. They give you a sense of normalcy.
I took advantage of having a little sister to flip my laundry.
Shout out to Olivia for constantly having my back in the house hold chore arena (and lots and lots of others)
Photos are also the best and worst.
Laughs and tears and sobs. They fill you with joy and sweet mems, but can set you off real quick.
You aren’t prepared like you think you are.
My dad asked me many times before I left if I was sure I wanted to move so far. I didn’t really understand what he meant until the second he left. I wasn’t ready. You can’t ever be ready. Theres nothing to prepare you for realizing your 4500 miles away from home, and theres no way to get there for at least 48 hours, but probably more like a week. Theres no book that could prepare you for the joy, pain, excitement, fear, or loss of water weight though tears that you’re gonna go though. You just gotta go though it. Its worth it, but its a damn hard journey. If you’re moving out, or recently moved out, or even still feel this months or years post moving out, you’re not alone.
Lots of love to you guys! Go out and live you’re best lives!!!